Tourists make me feel like every day is halloween! Mostly because they are all frightened of me, but what I have learned is that spooked people = generous people.
Where is the tourist?
I guess this film is about two Manhattan socialites who belittle and condescend some tourist for asking which train is going south.
That's just not my style! When I meet a tourist, I help them find their destination whether they like it or not.
NOW WE'RE TALKING!
Where is the magnificent mile? Oh, I could tell you but chances are you didn't ask me. Don't worry, though, I overheard you ask that nice lady walking her dog and took it upon myself to grab you with my unwashed hand packing 5 inch long fingernails, and take you there myself.
During our journey, I will insist you listen to my anecdote about how me and Dr. King used to shoot craps, and how I used to play the cello in the Chicago Symphony Orchestra until I was framed for running the Mexican drug cartel just because I was eating a fajita with Manuel Noriega.
Then, I will tell you some jokes! You'll laugh nervously, and once your head stops spinning, we will have arrived at the magnificent mile!
Then you will be so pleased, you will try to walk away, but I will follow you until you give me my pay for the day.
Thank you, it was my pleasure!
I give this film TWO FORTIES UP
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